Life, Vicariously

I realized something yesterday. When I'm pregnant, I try to live vicariously through my husband. I want him to be my arms and legs. I write to-do lists for him. I have great plans for all the projects I want [him] to accomplish. I think it's a coping mechanism.

Who wants to just give up on life for nine months? I am an organized, driven individual who under normal circumstances would never be found sitting in a lazy-boy for hours at a time. Or laying in bed for hours during the day. It's a miserable existence! So I think of things to do -- gardening/building the raised beds, organizing the garage, rearranging furniture, etc. and then hope that he will be able to give me the fulfillment of a job well done. While I sit in my chair and watch.

I have anywhere from 14-18 weeks left of this. I don't like it. I want to be done. I thought I'd try to push these feelings aside until I was within a few weeks of my due date, but I can't pretend! Being pregnant is not on my top 100 things I enjoy doing. In fact, I could probably think of 200 things I'd rather do. Or 1000. So, please enjoy life for me, my husband!!