I'm Outnumbered


I love my boys. I love this book. I love that this author "gets it". Four boys later, still the only female in the house, she knows how tough it can be. She knows when a bubble bath with some Michael Buble is in order.  She's not afraid to throw up her hands and tell her husband to "talk" to them. Ok, I'm putting words in her mouth. Sorry Laura. :)

She did write this:
"Don't expect him to communicate like you do. You want more, of course -- women thrive on description and detail, but you won't get it by saying, 'Tell me more.' You'll need to ask specific questions when he seems finished, like 'What happened on the playground today?' or 'Who did you sit with at lunch?'"
After giving mom a thousand kisses and hugs and brother more than one "love tackle", I've learned not to expect much when I look into his eyes and say "how are you feeling?" He'll bee-wiggle the answer. 
"Moms relate to faces and emotions; our boys generally relate to things and movement."
Boys tend to be:
*spatial instead of relational
*aware of objects instead of faces
*action-oriented instead of process-oriented
Yes. So I've noticed.

Mine might be a lonely existence. Which, in a way, is good -- since I love alone time. But I'll have to look to other females for "feeling chats" and relational activities. And when I'm learning to connect and super-glue-bond with the males in my life, I will have to be aware of their physical bent and work with it. I read in a book {might have been this one!} of a mother who walked with her son in order to have a quality conversation.

That works with my husband too. :)

And as they all grow up and mature{?}, the activity will INCREASE, not decrease. *hands raised helplessly in the air* Fortunately, they will also be more independent {one can hope, right?}. Driving themselves to soccer practice. Fixing their own butter/honey sandwiches. Peeing by themselves. Oh wait.

I was an only child. No brothers. Just me. In all that dreamy quietness.
"As the boys grew and multiplied, so did the noise and the activity -- beyond my expectations. Unless you had brothers, you don't really expect the racket, the constant motion, the physicality that comes from a combination of boys."
Change is good, right? Embracing new things. Yeah. I'm doing my best. :) The earplugs wait on top of the fridge.

Laura Groves does an excellent job in this book of admonishing mothers of sons to be intentional as we raise them {with all their uniqueness{es}}, encourage them to learn through play, teach them to be organized{!}, limit unnecessary media options, teach respect, help brothers to be life-long friends, and to keep dad super involved.

And then do something VERY female while they play ball in the backyard.